“Distance means so little when someone means so much.” – Tom McNeal

How many of us think it is true? Yes, I do not deny that the one you love does not mean to you at all but how much does he/she means to you while they are miles away is important. Do they hold the same position in your life even after years of long-distance relationships or you are only trying to push the relation just because you do not want to become the bad one by breaking up. Suffering in relation is equals to betraying the other. Have you ever thought why these distance increase between the two more than the actual distance that you are already in? Have you tried to sit and discuss them with your partner and solve them for the better of the two of you? Not only couples who are single face this but also married couples who have to live far away due to work face the same issue. Let’s understand what can be the ways to avoid issues and cultivate more of satisfaction and dedication to the relationships and fewer feelings of being trapped.

Make use of technology the most

We are lucky today that we have so many ways to get connected to each other through technology. A lot of day-to-day communication can happen with each other. Real-time sharing things instantly, photos, video calls, and text messages. Aren’t these enough to stay connected when your partner is miles away? Maybe not sometimes, as one would think that it is too much involvement of the other in personal space, too much of minute detailing happens every day which cannot be handled by one from the two and so things starts getting worst and distance start showing its actual meaning. When you do not have a chance to see each other it is the only communication that helps but that does not mean you have to constantly check on the other and control his/her life. Share important things of the day instead of just generalizations. If you had attended a party of went for a dinner do not just mention that, mention whom did you go with and how was the dinner, what did you talk, what was that something you ate and really loved the taste. Do not leave the other person assuming about all these because that may lead to wrong assumptions and create misunderstanding too.

Stay committed and loyal to the Relationship

The above statement of sharing everything instead of leaving them to assume will help them to understand and believe that you are loyal to them instead of creating negative thoughts in mind. If you had a glass of wine, share with them even when you know they do not like you drinking for any reason. It is always better to say it than hiding it because what you hide is what you would definitely spit it out during some other conversations someday and then you will feel like “oh hell what did I just do?”

Remember both of you have chosen to be in long distances because you have goals for the future individually. It was a combined decision of staying far away to become and achieve something in life which would eventually benefit the two of you as a couple then why differences occur, don’t you think it is necessary to discuss all this before and settle on few parameters of life and the relationship? You need to be very loyal to the relationship. If you think you will not be able to handle the distance then leave it do not play hide and seek. It is always better to end a relationship with a good note rather than hurting someone forever. Decide a date or a month or a year when you will end this distance and live together. It is really hard being apart and so you need to decide upon when to end this long-distance relationship and eventually live together in the same city. This will help you keep up with the excitement of getting back and not loose on the love between the two.

Do things together even if you’re away

Technology is rising day by day, you can use different online applications to watch a movie together at the same time or plan a dinner date over Skype. Netflix, Amazon Prime, makes it easy for you to watch a show with your partner.

Plan your meets

Sit together and plan what you will do the next time you see each other or plan a surprise visit for a weekend. Try to make a habit or talking every night before you sleep no matter even if that is for ten minutes if you are tired. Just to ask how your partner’s day was and to say how did your day go like. Talk on which new restaurants you would like to visit when you meet. Keep the enthusiasm high always to create something that both partners look forward to and also good night video calls just to feel that you both are going to bed together.

Confidence in your relationship

Be confident enough in your relationship and towards the person. Insecurities and over possessiveness will not lead you anywhere but create more distance emotionally. This can result in excessive calls and texts, trying to grab other’s attention somehow, and developing negativity can lead to unnecessary tension and dislike for the other. The frequency of interaction should not exceed due to insecurities, it is all to know the other person better being away. The other person will be turned off immediately and will start avoiding your calls and texts. Keep it simple and sweet do not complicate the relationship by involving any kind of boundaries. Trust the other person, one can be busy when you are free to talk and vice versa, any of you can have mood swings too and during that time it is important to understand the other and trust them with what they have to say instead of assuming that they are all excuses.

Love will travel as far as you let it travel. Be slow to judge the other. It is psychologically possible that when we’re separated from the other, our mind wanders to assumptions and judgments, put a break there itself and do not exaggerate to each and every situation as you are not alone who is away from the other one, he/she is equally away from you too. In some cases, few people get over critical on even a small situation and overreact as if they were told off by the other and that they are not valued or respected. Whereas that is not the case, you need to have that confidence in you and your relationship more than anything else. Rest is just irrational fantasies. Absence makes your heart go psychotic but change yourself and make the absence grow your heart fonder.

In any relation, it takes just one minute to spoil everything but it is the maturity of the two if you can handle that one minute so carefully and stop things from falling apart. This can happen only if you keep your ego aside and do not let that overcome the love between you two. Make the other person feel special by sending sweet text messages instead of pointing out why you didn’t do that first. Any of you can take that step first there is no such gender bias to this feeling. It is simply like how the wind is to fire it extinguishes the small and inflames the great. It is now you who has to decide what’s good between ego and love, whether to stop it when it is small or let it grow into flames and destroy it.

PS: It hurts not having you close, but it will hurt even more not having you at all.